Low Libido: Why It Happens And How To Treat It
Lost that loving feeling? Low libido affects almost all of us at some point. Sometimes we’re ready to do it anywhere, anytime, with anyone (and why the hell not?), while other times it’s the absolute last thing on our minds.
But it’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Libidos come and go, naturally fluctuating throughout our lives. But when you find yourself shunning sex for longer than you’d like, it might be time to make some changes.
At Hormones and You, we’re here to help. In this guide, we look at exactly what low libido is, its symptoms and causes (for men and women), and how to increase your libido so you can get back in the sack. Here’s how.
What is libido?
So, what exactly is your libido? In plain terms, libido is another word for your sex drive. How much you want sex, how often you want it, how much you enjoy sex — that’s all part of your libido, and it can vary from person to person.
Low libido or loss of libido is when you lose interest in sex. Rather than getting it daily, nightly and ever so rightly, you’d rather just roll over and sleep. And having a low sex drive is more common than you’d think — one study suggested that over a third of women had experienced low libido for three months or more.
Symptoms of low libido
Low libido is about more than just losing interest in knocking boots — it’s often more complicated than that. Symptoms of low libido include:
Lack or total loss of interest in any sexual activity — masturbation and touching yourself included
Having fewer sexual fantasies or thoughts
Feelings of emptiness or anxiety when a partner initiates sex
Feeling anxious about your loss of desire
The symptoms of low libido can vary, but if any of the above points ring a bell for you, it’s likely that you have low libido.
Causes of low libido
The libido is a complex thing. Our body is a delicate ecosystem, and many factors can cause our sexual spark to fade.
Let’s take a look at a few of the most common causes of low libido.
Stress and fatigue: we’ve all had those days when we come back from the worst week at work and sex is the last thing on our minds. Chronic stress and fatigue are a huge mood-killer, whether it’s from a demanding job or demanding kids.
Lifestyle factors: a glass of wine or two might put you in the mood for a night in the sheets, but a few too many can actually wipe out your libido. Excessive alcohol, smoking or recreational drugs can all contribute towards a lowered libido.
Life-changing events: a new career change, the loss of a loved one, moving house — these are all significant life events that can push sex to the very back of your mind.
Medication: most medications have side effects, and low libido is one of the more troublesome ones. Antidepressants such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) in particular, can cause a dip in your sex drive.
Health conditions: there are a number of medical conditions that can also make you lose your libido, including arthritis, cancer, high blood pressure, coronary artery disease, diabetes and neurological diseases, amongst others.
Negative sexual experiences: Unresolved sexual trauma can reduce libido too. A traumatic sexual experience, coupled with the associated mental health difficulties that come with it, can significantly dampen your desire to have sex.
Low libido in women
There are several factors, unique to women, that can also cause a drop in your sex drive. Medical conditions that cause vaginal pain, such as endometriosis or vaginismus, can indirectly result in a loss of libido in women. When sex becomes painful as a result of these conditions, reduced sex drive can naturally follow.
Hormonal changes are another big downer for your libido. During menopause, your body experiences a significant drop in oestrogen, causing dramatic emotional and mental changes — including a lowered libido. For more info, please read our article ‘Menopause And Libido’.
Hormonal changes during pregnancy, after having a baby and while breastfeeding can affect libido too. And unsurprisingly, the fatigue, lack of sleep, changes to how you see your body and the pressure of looking after a brand-new baby also can contribute to lowering your sex drive.
Low libido in men
Men can experience low libido for a number of reasons, many of which can affect anyone.
Testosterone — that powerful hormone — is responsible for a number of things, including libido. While testosterone levels vary between men, low levels of testosterone naturally result in reduced libido. Testosterone isn’t just a male hormone — more on that below.
Ageing plays a big part in libido too. As men age, their testosterone levels drop, usually by 1% every year between the ages of 30 and 40, and so too does their sex drive. But low testosterone can also happen at any age, with dramatic drops resulting in decreased libido for men.
Coupled with this is the fact that it gets harder to achieve an erection as you get older. Erectile dysfunction (ED) as you age can often be caused by a range of factors, from decreased testosterone to social factors (such as doing less exercise) and health reasons. And when a man can’t get it up, they’re often less inclined to seek out sex too.
Testosterone and low libido
Testosterone is a female hormone too.
Low testosterone levels can affect all sorts of things, including energy, mood, motivation, muscle mass and — you’ve guessed it — libido. It can also cause vaginal dryness, painful intercourse and UTIs, which can impact the sex drive too.
Testosterone levels can be depleted by factors such as contraceptives, stress, over-exercising, not eating enough nourishing food, and overworking yourself.
If you’re a woman with hormone deficiency, a low-dose bioidentical libido cream can replenish your hormone levels and help you get your mojo back.
How to increase libido
Low libido can be a source of deep anxiety. In a world where it seems everyone is having sex all the time, losing interest in sex yourself can make you feel like the odd one out.
But it’s not all doom and gloom. There are lots of ways you can increase your libido, from lifestyle and behavioural changes to medical intervention and accessible medications.
Exercise more: you know how energised you feel after a good workout? One of the best things you can do to boost your libido is to exercise regularly, increasing your stamina, lifting your mood and giving your self-confidence a handy little uplift too.
Make some lifestyle changes: as we mentioned earlier, smoking, alcohol and recreational drugs can all dampen your desire. Cut out smoking and drugs altogether, and moderate your alcohol intake, to help give your libido a boost.
Get enough sleep: there’s nothing like a rough night in bed to stop you from getting a good night in bed. Try to get between 7–8 hours of solid sleep a night, and your libido will thank you for it.
Improve your diet: it makes sense that what you put into your body affects how it performs. Ditch the takeaways and opt for a diet rich in vegetables and protein instead — nuts, seeds, salmon, apples and beetroot are all packed with libido-boosting nutrients.
Treatments for low libido
If natural remedies or lifestyle changes don’t quite put the spice back in your sex life, it might be worth considering a dedicated course of treatment instead. Here are a few handy ways to give your libido the kickstart it needs.
Sex therapy: if you find your libido is still lacking, there might be an underlying psychological issue that needs addressing. A sex therapist can help unpack the emotional, psychological and sexual factors that are causing your low sex drive.
Relationship counselling: sometimes, a reduced libido can be a result of relationship difficulties. Speak to a professional, either with your partner or alone, to assess how you can move forward together and reawaken your libido.
Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT): if your loss of interest in sex is a result of a mental condition such as anxiety or depression, CBT can help you relieve and manage your negative thoughts so you can rediscover the joy of sex again.
Medications: if medical problems are causing your low libido, there are some medications you can try to help relieve them. Vaginal dryness, for instance, can be helped with a little lube, while erectile dysfunction can be treated with sildenafil (aka Viagra).
Hormonal therapy: suffering from low libido caused by hormonal changes? A course of Hormone and You's bioidentical libido cream can help boost your sex drive by restoring your hormone balance — boosting your energy, confidence and libido, all at once.
How we can help
Low libido can affect us all, with a variety of different causes that can stop us from enjoying a fulfilling session between the sheets.
But there’s no need to suffer in silence — there are plenty of things you can do to relight that fire, from regular exercise and ditching your bad habits to dedicated sex therapy and hormonal treatments. Don’t just put up with low libido — get the help you need from Hormones and You.
Get in touch today to discover how our range of accessible, natural and personalised hormone solutions can get you back in the saddle (riding crop optional).
